Recovery JOW #880

It has been an interesting time since I posted my last JOW.  Ruth and I have both been somewhat involved in the recovery effort.  I had the opportunity to assist with water damage assessment for five schools and a hospital inside Houston.  While visiting these facilities, I was astonished not just at the sheer size of the areas that were flooded but at the amazing response.  Everywhere there was intense, focused cleanup activity.  The energy being brought to bear was simply amazing.  All over Houston people were lining up, not to get a government handout; no, they lined up to volunteer.  A day after the storm had passed, people had already begun to pile sad heaps of wet drywall pulled from homes, along with rugs and any other of their possessions that had been ruined by the floods.  These mounds of ruined possessions now form walls lining many Houston streets.

Thousands of people are still homeless; tens of thousands of homes and businesses were significantly flooded; hundreds of thousands of cars were caught in the flooding.  Even so, things are starting to come back to life, at least in the neighborhoods not inundated by the Army Corps of Engineers who released a deluge from area dams into neighborhoods not previously flooded.  I admit to a bias against the Corps of Engineers and their civil works; as far as I am concerned, their uniforms should include a big red nose and floppy shoes.

Even so, with the incredible energy of this region and the vast influx of resources coming in Houston will be back to its productive self far soon than anyone expected. 

Now comes the hard part of the recovery.  After the army of volunteers have departed, thousands of people will still have no place to live.  Others will face crushing bills to repair their homes.  Harvey was a worst-case disaster.  It was predicted, people prepared for it, and the response was immediate and effective.  Even so, you cannot dump a full year’s rainfall in five days over a major metropolitan region and not have an enormous economic hit.

On a lighter note, here are some jokes this week.

I nearly became a Doctor.

When I was young in the 1970's, I decided I wanted to be a doctor, so I took the entrance exam to go to Medical School.

One of the questions asked was to rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of an important human body part, which is most useful when fully erect.

Those who answered 'spine' are doctors today.

The rest of us are sending jokes via email.

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Just as Sam was about to fall asleep, his wife shook him and said, "I hear someone breaking in."
At least two nights a week for twenty years Sam had gone through this. He knew that the only way he would get any rest was to go and check it out. So, he went out for a routine check.
When Sam entered the den he was surprised to see a thief. The man held a gun on him and continued to rob the house.
As the thief was about to leave Sam said, "You have to go and meet my wife, Jane."
The thief said, "Why would you want me to meet your wife?"
Sam replied, "Well, she's been expecting you from 20 years."

A few one-liners

·         Do not regret getting older.  It is a privilege denied to many.

·         If you judge a fish by its ability to climb trees, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.

·         Whoever said ‘diamonds are a girl’s best friend’ never owned a dog.

·         Even duct tape can't fix stupid ... but it can muffle the sound!

·         At my age "Getting lucky" means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for.

·         My body ain’t what it used to be.  Even when I am naked, I want to slip into something more comfortable.

·         I called the incontinence hotline.  They told me to hold.

·         I fell down the stairs last week.  It was the fastest I had moved in years.

·         I am one step away from being rich.  All I need now is money.

·         Ever considered there is a highway to hell but only a staircase to heaven?

·         Be careful when you follow the masses.  Sometimes the ‘m’ is silent. 

·         It is better to walk alone that with a crowd moving in the wrong direction.

·         Spending time with children is more important than spending money on children.

·         Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person is an idiot.

·         How many thin mints do I have to eat before I start seeing results?

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Dear Algebra, please stop asking us to find your ‘X’.  She has moved on.  Don’t ask ‘Y’.

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Ten bad headlines:

1. Blind Woman Gets New Kidney from Dad She Hasn't Seen In Years
2. 20-Year Friendship Ends at Altar
3. Plane Too Close To Ground-Crash Probe Told
4. Child's Stool Great for Use In Garden
5. Mrs. Corson's Seat Up For Grabs
6. Prison Guard Probed In Prison Sex Scandal
7. After Panda Mating Fails Veterinarian Takes Over
8. Organ Festival Ends In Smashing Climax
9. Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
10. Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents

A doctor joke

Four doctors went duck hunting – a family practitioner, a gynecologist, a surgeon, and a pathologist.

A bird flew over their blind.

The family practitioner started to shoot but held his fire because he was not absolutely sure it was a duck.

The gynecologist did not shoot because he was not sure if it was a male or female duck.

The surgeon blew the bird out of the sky.  He turned to the pathologist and said, “Go see if that was a duck.”