Quote JOW Unquote

I enjoy witty conversation. I freely admit to being something of a smart ass, which is critical to interesting discussions. Of course not everyone appreciates wit.
"Wit is educated insolence." - Aristotle
Which fits pretty well, but then Aristotle was kind of a stick in the mud. We know he wrote a book on Comedy to go with his treatise on Tragedy. Unfortunately, (or should I say tragically) his treatise on comedy and humor was lost. Probably because the book was so thin. That said, even Voltaire himself, one of the wittiest men who ever lived disparaged a clever retort.
"A witty saying proves nothing." – Voltaire
Apparently wit is viewed by many as only a half step above the much maligned pun as a form of humor; even below ‘knock-knock’ and ‘light bulb’ jokes ─ too bad because I like those forms of humor, too. In the end I choose to follow the advice of the bard.
Better a witty fool than a foolish wit. - Shakespeare
Here are some quotes that I found very witty, indeed.

Oscar Wilde was one of the sharpest wits of his generation. These are attributed to him.

• “I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.”
• “Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.”
• “Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess.”
• It is better to be beautiful than to be good, but it is better to be good than to be ugly.
• Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.”

This is one of my favorite quotes because it is so accurate.

• "University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small." - Henry Kissinger

There are lots of pithy comments about cats and dogs.

• Dogs have Owners, Cats have Staff.

• In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.

Everyone loves those predictions pontificated by those who should have known better.

• "Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction."
Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872 .

• "Everything that can be invented has been invented."
Charles Duell, head of the US Patent office 1880

• "The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urging for investment in the radio in the 1920s.

And some predictions that are more interesting than they first appear.

• "Computers are useless. They can only give you answers." Pablo Picasso.

Then there are the quotations of the absurd.

• "Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can't remember what they are." Matt Lauer on NBC's Today Show

• "If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight."
George Gobol.

• "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning."
Rich Cook.

• "USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population."
David Letterman.

• “I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was "You'll never find anyone like me again!" I'm thinking, "I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you."”

• If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

• All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.

• Just because nobody complains doesn't mean all parachutes are perfect.

And finally, a bit of wit that touches close to home

• "Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers." - T. S. Eliot



Thos. Pinney