Memorial Day JOW #715

Today is Memorial Day, once called Decoration Day when people would put flowers on the graves of soldiers you died in the War Between the States.  It is not necessarily about veterans, but is about those veterans who died on active service.  It would be good if we did not need to have the Armed Forces but unfortunately, the world is just full of assholes.  George Orwell is credited with the following quote.  “We sleep soundly because rough men stand ready in the night  to visit violence on those who would do us harm.” 

Enjoy your Memorial Day.  Here is another quote to ponder.

Never Forget that Except For Ending Slavery, Fascism, Nazism, Socialism and Communism, War has Never Solved Anything.

For my gun control friends – you have no idea how bad it is in some place.

Stationed in Bosnia, NATO launched an operation to collect leftover war weapons from civilians. After a particularly good haul from one home, the sergeant in charge joked that they'd be back later to pick up the tank. The owner sheepishly led him to a shed behind the house. There stood a T-55 tank in perfect working order.

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Ah, the M67 fragmentation grenade – when ‘screw you’ is not enough to get your point across. 

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The Korean War, in which the Marine Corps fought and won some of its most brutal battles, was not without its gallows humor.

During one such conflict, a ROK (Republic of Korea) commander, whose unit was fighting along with the Marines, got on the horn to legendary Marine General Chesty Puller, to report a major Chinese attack in his sector.

"How many Chinese are attacking you?" asked Puller.

"Many, many Chinese!" replied the excited Korean officer.

General Puller asked for another count.... and got a similar, anxious answer: "Many, many, MANY Chinese!"

" %* # ! dammit ! " swore Puller, "Put my Marine liaison officer on the radio."

In a minute, an American voice came over the air: "Yes sir! ! ?"

"Lieutenant," growled Chesty, "exactly how many Chinese you got up there?”

"General, we got a whole sh*tload of Chinese up here!" 

"Thank God." exclaimed Puller, "At least there's someone up there who knows how to count."

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'The true Soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because He loves what is behind him.' -G. K. Chesterton

Some of these are on tee shirts and some are on bumper stickers

Ø  U.S. Marines - Certified Counselors to the 72 Virgins Dating Club

Ø  U.S. Air Force - Travel Agents to Allah

Ø  When In Doubt, Empty the Magazine

Ø  The Marine Corps - When It Absolutely, Positively Has To Be Destroyed Overnight

Ø  Death Smiles At Everyone - Marines Smile Back

Ø  Marine Sniper - You can run, but you'll just die tired!

Ø  Napalm is okay by me

Ø  Artillery Brings Dignity to What Would Otherwise Be Just a Vulgar Brawl

Ø  One Shot, Twelve Kills - U.S. Naval Gun Fire Support - Go Navy !

Ø  If You Can Read This, Thank A Teacher.  If You Can Read It In English, Thank A Veteran

Three weeks into training camp, the young sailor still hadn’t gotten used to Navy cooking and was surviving on milk and desserts. In one food line, he picked up the biggest piece of cake available and set it on his tray. The mess cook behind the counter saw the gleam in his eye and asked him if he’d like two pieces. When he eagerly answered that I would, the cook leaned over and cut the piece of cake in two.

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A former Marine went to work for United Parcel Service. They bought their four-year-old son two stuffed bears — one in a UPS uniform and the other in Marine garb.

When the boy seemed confused, his father brought out a picture of himself in full Marine dress. “See, Connor?” he explained, pointing to the photo and then to the bear. “That’s Daddy.”

Connor’s eyes went from one to the other, and then he asked in a puzzled voice, “You used to be a bear?”

A retired Navy admiral began a second career working in a bank. One morning, while he prepared his desk for the day, he was approached by a young officer from the nearby Naval base. “Sorry, but this department isn’t open yet,” the admiral said.

“But it’s nine o’clock!” protested the officer.

The old man didn’t look at his watch. Instead, he surveyed his customer’s uniform. “Ensign,” he snapped, “I’ll decide when it’s nine o’clock!”

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A new soldier was on sentry duty at the main gate. His orders were
clear; no car was to enter unless it had a special sticker on the
windshield. A big Army car came up with a general seated in the back.
The sentry said, "Halt, who goes there?"
The chauffeur, a corporal, says, "General Wheeler."
"I'm sorry, I can't let you through. You've got to have a sticker
on the windshield."
The general said, "Drive on!"
The sentry said, "Hold it! You really can't come through. I have
orders to shoot if you try driving in without a sticker."
The general repeated, "I'm telling you, son, drive on."
The sentry walked up to the rear window and said, "General, I'm new
at this. Do I shoot you or the driver?"

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Stephen Colbert has a lot of great quotes:  Here are a few of my favorites:

·         "The pen is mightier than the sword, if you shoot that pen out of a gun.

·         "An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough."

·         "Don't cry over spilled milk. By this time tomorrow, it'll be free yogurt."

·         "Contrary to what people may say, there's no upper limit on stupidity."

·         “I cannot stand people who disagree with me on the issue of Roe v. Wade... which I believe is about the proper way to cross a lake.”